Orientation Couples: Is There a Formula for Love?

By Foo Le Xuan Shanice (25S03A)

Love is in the air. Under the blazing hot sun, the seeds of love begin to sprout. Amidst deafening cheers and pounding music, 2 pairs of eyes lock, their hearts finding a common beat. The surrounding fades away as you take in every moment in slow-mo [cue KDrama music]. 

We all know when we see one, the inauguration of yet another orientation couple—2 people who have gotten together during orientation. Perhaps it’s the late-night OG dinners under the oh-so-romantically dim lights at the J8 rooftop, or the electrifying brush of fingers as their hearts pulsate along to the catchy beat of the mass dance, or even being near someone of the opposite gender for the first time? 

Is there a formula for finding true love in 3 days? In this article, let’s explore the fallen (in love) and the science behind falling in love. We’ll be finding out more about this phenomenon by analysing psychological theories on attraction (and a healthy dose of KDrama cliches).

Take the Shaking Bridge Effect, a psychological effect proposed by Arthur Aron, a professor of psychology at the State University of New York. 

Have you ever felt that tremor in your heart? The way it beats faster and faster, the erratic drumming deafening in your ears? It’s like you can feel the blood rushing in your veins. You can almost feel your breath lose its way. Your stomach churns, threatening to spill your lunch. Now you might be wondering, are you facing impending danger? Or are you falling in love? 

What if it’s both?

This theory hypothesises that falling in love is like when you are coming across a shaking bridge, and your heart is beating fast. Suddenly, you see someone in your sight, and the adrenaline rush contributes to the affection you feel toward a particular person.

In the context of orientation, where one is thrust into a new environment with unfamiliar faces, it is bound to be nerve-wracking at the start. A bunch of wide-eyed youths thrown into a whole new world. Treading carefully with hearts on tenterhooks. Amidst the chaos, 2 pairs of eyes lock—and the rest is history.

Was it their swoon-worthiness, a lack of exercise or cupid’s bow? Does it matter which it was you fell for? 

Next, Frenning’s Attraction Theory states that Personal Appearance, Proximity, and Similarity are the main forces behind interpersonal attraction. 

Appearance

First impressions are of utmost importance, especially since it is said that it takes just 3 seconds for someone to decide if they’re attracted to you. While it may not all contribute to a crush, physical appearance plays a pivotal role in shaping one’s initial perception of another and makes them more likely to approach the other party. 

During Maritime Madness when we had to do challenges to gain points for our house, I noticed a shuaige (handsome guy) from another OG across the room. I tried to team up with him to do the challenges together so we had a chance to talk.

Starstruck Susan

Proximity

Spending 8 hours a day together over 3 days of intensive bonding activities is sure to bring out more than just 2 truths and 1 lie from you. From playing hide and seek through the dimly lit campus in the evening to showing the most authentic side of yourself (all that sweating throughout orientation is no joke). Being in an environment where you’re forced to spend time with one another, there are more chances to interact and learn quirks about the person that you’ve never learned before, building on more than just the first impression and hence making you more likely to develop positive feelings for them. 

I started becoming more interested in him after I realised some of the small acts he did for other people as well as the way he carried himself that really stood out to me. I remember intentionally taking the opposite direction of the train just to have more time to talk to him.

A Happy Orientation Couple

Similarity

As the saying goes, “Like attracts like”—people who are similar to us reinforce our sense of self-identity, and others who share our traits and beliefs validate our views. It is undeniable that orientation ignites a collective sense of school spirit in all of us, as we dorn various accessories like face paint, bandanas, and shoelaces while cheering our hearts out. This brings about a common goal and a shared sense of belonging, evoking positive feelings of being on the same team. 

Come heed the call Rafflesians all / And let our hearts be stirring

(Maybe the countless amount of times we sang this verse willed it into existence)

Being on the same team as someone also brings forth a desire to root for them and support them in all that they do. It also makes interactions more intimate and meaningful as it elicits a sense of exclusivity. This emulates positive feelings similar to those in a relationship– usually centred around exclusive companionship– bringing out the prospect of getting into a relationship with the other party. 

From the sources I’ve gathered throughout this investigation, I have taken it upon myself to come up with my theory for the relationships formed during orientation. Heavily inspired by Sternburg’s Triangular Theory of Love, I have gathered that 3 main factors contribute towards the formation of an orientation couple. 

1. Proximity– orientation allows for both parties to spend time with one another and develop positive feelings
2. Physical attraction– to pique one’s interest and create the desire to get to know the other party better (after all, time is of the essence in the short 3-day period of orientation)
3. Common ground (shared values, morals, goals, experiences)– important in striking up meaningful conversations and building good relations. 

Conclusion

To all the hopeless romantics who have read till here, do not feel discouraged. After all, orientation is just one of the many places to find love. There’s no saying you can’t be a “chill couple”, a “windy benches couple” or even a “printing shop couple”. If there’s someone in mind right now, don’t leave it up to fate—just go for it! You never know what can be unless you try.

I’ll end with a (modified) quote by Oscar Wilde: “You don’t love someone for their looks (facepainted or not), or their clothes (sweat-drenched camp tee), or for their fancy car (dance moves), but because they sing a (school) song only you can hear.”